Family has always looked a certain way to me. One or two parents with their children. As a single woman I wonder, where do I belong? Do I get to have a family too, even if I don't find my person?
In my younger days, I always thought I would be married with children at this point in life. And without those things, I am alone. I am invited to various events and holidays, but then return home solo. Included in the big things, but understandably overlooked in the small things. An observer, but never a part of.
I've hustled for so long because I feel like I am the only one who will be looking out for myself. That terrifies me therefore I've worked so hard to prove to myself that I'll be ok. Even if I have no family of my own, I'll still be ok.
This past year has changed my idea of family, of belonging, in the most beautiful way. I have been living in a community house with friends. Two married couples and myself. At first I kept my distance and considered myself and my voice unimportant. I am one and they are all two. Two is greater than one.
Then one of the couples, came in, found me in my lonliness, and brought me into their family. They include me in both the small and the big things, the mundane and the extraordinary. They don't just tell me about their adventures, but invite me to come along and share the journey. They listen to me with genuine love and caring. And mostly they remind me that I am not alone, but a part of their family.
It is the most wonderful thing to be part of a family. To be single, but still a part of. My family looks so different than I had imagined. But it is even lovelier because it is so unexpected. One day I may find my person, but I hope this new definition of family and community never leaves my heart.